July 6, 2021

Teenagers with Autism Series: Academic Expectations

Parenting a teenager can definitely be scary. When you add autism into the mix, it can be even more worrisome. What do you need to do to make sure that your teen can function and be safe once they go out into the world? How can you help them to nourish their natural gifts so that they can enjoy that life once they get there? And what can you do to get through these teenage years with your sanity intact?

In this series of blogs, we will focus on suggestions for parents of teenagers on the autism spectrum. I speak, not just as a clinician and Board Certified Behavior Analyst, but also as the parent of two teenagers with ASD. In this article, fifth of this series, we will look at how to help your child or teen prepare for their educational future with their wants and needs in mind.

Really early on, I knew that I wanted all my kids to go to college. I mean, what parent doesn’t want that for their children? I knew that I did not want them to take the path that I did; it took a lot of work, dedication, tears, and student debt to get to where I am today. I wanted to have them go directly into a four-year university and avoid all the drama and hardship. However, it became clear pretty quickly that this might be my dream, but it wasn’t my son’s.

My son had a different vision from me, and he let me know very early on that a four-year university was not in his immediate plans. How may you ask? Well, the more I pushed the 4 years on him, the more he resisted and got poor grades. One day, I had enough and asked him why he was acting this way, when I only wanted what was best for him. He let me know that he felt pressured, and he felt like he wasn’t sure that was what he wanted. And he was right! I had been pressuring him all this time when, in fact, he was showing me he needed more time to mature and figure out what he wanted.

What I’ve realized as a parent is that we really need to encourage and not pressure our children to go to a four-year university. Grades are important but trade schools or community colleges can be just as rewarding for our children. I know of several colleges in California that really work on fostering that will help adults with ASD and various abilities achieve their true potential. So, research schools, look at what they have to offer students with ASD, and get your child involved. It is their future, in the end, so work with them to create a path that they feel comfortable with and excited about.

Elizabeth Gudiel, M.A., BCBA
Clinical Director, Salt Lake City, UT
Tuesday, July 6, 2021

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